Four brides. Four weddings. Four completely different sets of expectations. And opinions (thank God). Channel 7’s latest reality offering Four Weddings is substantially cheaper to produce than The X Factor, and dare I say it, far more entertaining.

I’ve been to a few weddings in my time – even a couple of my own. As a bloke, there are details we just don’t appreciate (or even notice). Ladies see everything. EVERYTHING. They will be able to spot that one bridesmaid had a dress that was a slightly different shade to the others. They’ll notice the way the bride’s gown has been taken in or let out and the glaring errors therein. They’ll notice who is sitting where at the reception…

Locking 4 ladies together, having already planned their dream weddings to compare notes and then judge each other to determine whose wedding was best is pure reality TV fodder, and I’m loving every bit of it. From the excesses of a “Hollywood wedding” to the quirks of a “Pagan wedding” and everything in between (including “Bogan chic”, viewers are initially subjected to the brides-to-be meeting in a pub/coffee shop to compare notes on their weddings – ensuring expectations are very low or very high when it comes turn for each to attend the other’s special day.

Built as standard fare with @Fifi_Box narrating, each of the girls take turns to have their wedding & reception, with the other three attending as guests and offering judgement on “the ceremony”, “the reception”, “the dress” & “the food”. Additionally each contestant provides some high/lowlights in their interviews interspersed through the episode… with all sorts of opinions (some supportive, some as catty as hell).

It’s right here that the show fails. It seeks to polarise people based entirely on opinion when every rational person knows that a wedding is a reflection on the bride (and to a much lesser extent, the groom). This is what they wanted to do, how they wanted to share the expression of their love publicly. Having people judge them on how they thought they did is superfluous. It just doesn’t matter. As long as the bride & groom are happy, then job done. Subsequently, very few supportive comments are aired from the contestants. It’s a bitch-fight at the OK Corral. But that’s what makes it fun, & where the show redeems itself – the snark.

I’d offer that the contestants are, on the whole, likely a lovely bunch of people. Certainly the one contestant I’ve met on Twitter is, and she was very happy with her wedding and experience on the show, even though she didn’t win. It’s a shame that we’ve come to expect venom from contestants to make a reality show watchable.

As long as that’s what they give me, I’ll keep tuning in. You canNOT have those flowers with that table setting with those decorations…

Four Weddings, 7:30pm Tuesdays, 7 Network