TV loves can find us in the weirdest of places. Billboards. Promos. Laneways for completely legit, non-sexual reasons.
Early last year, something really momentous happened to me. You could say it changed my life.
It happened in the Shangri-La Hotel. It was a “24-Hour Challenge” on this thing I was working on. I was flipping eggs, people were all up in my grill. It was a pretty shitty morning.
And then… Michael Cera.It was like seeing an old flame. The one that got away. The one who left you with unresolved feelings and a box-set of memories.
I didn’t say ‘hi’. I didn’t even gesticulate in his general direction. Not even a little bit of flippy-wrist-waving, which is my standard M.O.
I gave Michael Cera terrible Customer Service. I just scurried around the corner to stare at him, wide-eyed, like a small marsupial. In a stupid blue hat.
And I’ll never forgive myself. And I’ll never forget. Because he could totally have been the jewel in my Instagram collection. Talk about opportunity wasted.
It was at this point in my life’s journey that I realized that I must always carpe diem. I must feel the fear, and do it anyway. I must Unleash the Power Within.
Also, I should probably just admit to my infatuation with Arrested Development.I’m sure there are those of you already smiling in approval at the very thought of having found a fellow AD-dict. Maybe a couple of people preparing to do their best chicken impersonation as a sure sign of concurrence. Perhaps even some guy on a Segway, reading this on his “smartphone”, nodding along so emphatically that he… oh.
Well, that was a huge mistake.
But for those who have no idea what I’m talking about – or are thinking “yeah, I just couldn’t quite get into it” – you must reconsider. Oh, you simply must!
I don’t want to give too much away, which is why most of this post reads like the stream of consciousness of a teenage girl, but what I can tell you, is that this is the kind of show that will stand the test of time.
So well does it date, in fact, that the producers of the program finally capitulated and created a new series (ermahgerd!) to be released later this month on Netflix.
My fellow television watchers, I implore you; don’t live a life of regret. Go out and find yourself the first three seasons of Arrested Development, watch them, enjoy them, thank me privately (or publically).
And, if you ever happen to find yourself in the presence of Michael Cera, please, for the love of magicians, loose seals and hop-ons, say ‘hi’.
*sigh*Since leaving her career as a pretty good teacher to make a spectacle of herself on Masterchef Australia Series 4, Alice Zaslavsky has much more time to watch TV. As the new host of popular game show Kitchen Whiz and with a reference book for young adults about Real Food on the way, her mission to get kids eating their greens (and plums and oranges and the like) is ticking along quite delightfully.
Her recipes, foodie experiences and general musings on life abound at www.alicez.com.au or you can find her on various forms of social media as @aliceinframes. There is no truth in the rumour that Alice is related to the Proclaimers, Brains from the Thunderbirds, or that Steve Molk was once her muse. She also absolves Molk of all guilt he may feel about snarking the shitake out her in MC recaps. She’s good like that.