Big Brother Australia – Sun 6:30pm, Mon-Fri 7pm, Ch9
Kind of a meepy episode tonight. Crazy intruders continue, Ben loses another Captain’s challenge, Michael doesn’t love Zoe, Michael has this bizarre love/hate thing going on with Estelle and Layla has trust issues.

Scene one:
Housemates wake to a beautiful day, Sam has his shirt off and all is good in the BB world.
HMs have each been assigned a letterbox, a Sam has been delivered a ticket to allow him access to the new temple room, where housemates can find themselves and their inner peace.

Zoe, meanwhile has been given an order to clean up the house, which she must allocate to a housemate. She picks Michael. Michael talks to the bathroom pipes and tiles, while the other HMs snuggle in bed together. Zoe can hear Michael’s ramblings in the bathroom and tells her fellow snuggle buddies he has the “voice of an angel.” Turns out Zo has a “thing for redheads” and reveals she has fallen in love with Mickey. Aww.

Later, Ben is doing laps of the backyard and Sam is in the kitchen, as the Three Bears & Goldilocks intrude; complete with porridge. The housemates make gags about varying hardness of seats until the bears and Goldi leave.

Ben & Sam chat about the “Sayla” phenomenon over a workout. Sam has a singlet on. Sam & Layla have agreed they are both keeping open minds about the future.

Soon after, down time is rudely interrupted by a truckload of camera-wielding tourists, who proceed to climb all over the housemates and snap pictures of them, a concept Zoe is struggling with.

As the intruders leave, Layla straightens Stacey’s hair in the bathroom, while Sam flops on the green lumpy lounge to chill out. Estelle flops herself on top of Sam, and questions him about the intruders: “Were they saying, like, ‘OMG, Sam’s so hot’?”

Cue awkies as Layla and Stacey quickly exit the bathroom and roll eyes at each other in the bedroom, over what just happened. Now, I do think Estelle is well-meaning, and -I’ve said this before- she has never been unkind or bitchy during her time in the house. But she does do some pretty odd things sometimes.

My theory is, perhaps with the body confidence she has, along with the tom-boyish attitude where all guys are free for the friendship, she doesn’t really think about how flopping on top of someone else’s fella while he’s lying down and his Mrs is in the room actually looks. I genuinely think she has no ulterior motive, I think it’s just that she can and she does, regardless of the vibe in the room.
Cue perfect timing as Zoe enlightens Layla with her relationship philosophy 101: “Every relationship needs a third wheel…. No one likes a bike, everyone loves a tricycle.” Oh you, Zoe!

Estelle continues to stab at Sam’s quiet with random comments and questions in an Elmo voice, and kind-gentle-not-wanting-to-offend-anyone-Sam politely excuses himself retreats to the solace of Layla’s snuggles in the bedroom.

It’s Captain’s Challenge time, and total self-sacrificing Zoe gives Michael a back rub in the lounge.

The girls chat over the Captain’s Curse which has seen a number of challenge-winning HMs get booted out of the house shortly after. Beautiful Zoe says if she wins she will take Ben.

The Captain’s Challenge for the week is a series of short tasks, beginning with completing giant puzzles of evicted HM faces.

Ben has won a ticket which gives him free entry straight to Task two, which is eating a large bowl of tofu with chopsticks. Ever the positive-self-talker, Ben tells everyone he “hates eating challenges” and he’s “never gonna win” and -yes, he gets flogged by Michael, Zoe and Layla- and goes back to the other HMs to sulk. While I do feel for him and his identity crisis at seeing himself as a loser (I do take that seriously), I think he knows by now that any of the HMs will take him in as their guest, so he’s pretty much onto a winner, innit?

Layla’s out in the next task of skulling one of Ray’s Choccie Milks, and it’s down to Zoe and Mickey to fight it out in the final task of counting George’s money bags.

Ben has to be loving his chances right about now, as both Zoe and Michael are sure bets for taking him in with them, I think I see his little eyes light up as Michael is revealed as the winner; nope, they’ve gone all squinty again as BB tells Michael he can choose between taking ALL the girls, or ONE of the boys, ooh there’s that Maclean’s smile again and Ben is GOING INTO THE CAPTAIN’S QUARTERS!!!!!

Insert much screaming, jumping, pickup up and hugging, more screaming here.

Ben is like a kid in a luxurious candy shop, and he and Michael speculate over whether they will miss out on intruders.

They sit down to a champagne brekky, and Ben pipes prompts Michael by saying “I hope you don’t mind being on a date with a gay man,” to which Michael whoops, raises his glass and shouts “Mama! I finally made it!”

Similar to Michael’s openness in his plutonic love for his bestie Josh, it’s a nice moment; just one of many we have seen in this series which I hope will encourage many open conversations of tolerance and acceptance of everyone, in the family homes around our awesome country. E.L.E!!!!! Just sayin.

*Climbs off soap box now*

Layla and Estelle chat out in the lounges the “Pact” to take Ben into the house, but Layla says she was not part of it because she was hoping to get a proper night in the quarters that had not been ransacked by pirates, and she would have taken Sam.

Ben tells Michael that he thinks Layla may be strategizing by being with Sam and feels Sam will end up being hurt by Layla’s obvious strategic hook-ups: first George, then Sam.

Michael says that he used to think Layla was the hottest girl, but now he thinks it’s Estelle, but Ben says no, Estelle was “always the hottest girl in here, by far.” Ouch.

Cue more intruders and this time it’s the Coomera Colts <12s Soccer Team REPRESENT!

It’s quite actually coz who can resist a little muchkin in soccer boots climbing all over you and playing with you hair. The HMs do a great job, including ignoring one rather mouthy little fellow who makes smart-arse comments to all the ignorant HMs.

Things are getting interesting in the CQ, as Michael poses to Ben: “What do you think would happen if I started a relationship with Estelle? Is that the worst thing in the world?”

Yep. I got nothing.

Ben’s wisdom: “Aside from Zoe never speaking to you again (Michael laughs hysterically), she actually has bothered you at some points of being in this house.” Yes Ben, thankyou HELLOOOOOOO!!!
Michael retorts: “But that’s the joke”
Ben: “But one small part of your brain has actually thought about it.”
Michael: “A rather large part of my brain thinks about it ALL the time.” Hmm.
Ben: “Do you think that way about anyone else in the house?”
Michael: “No. But I like everyone else in the house.”

Ok, Michael I love you and those luscious rusty locks but dude, no wonder the whole freaking world thinks us Rangas be crazy. We are a genetic minority, we need the numbers for breeding. Hustle dammit.

Dr Ben: “You sick, sad, strange, little man.” Yep.

Turns out CQ is not quarantined from intruders and soon after their sanctuary is rampaged by little people, who climb all over Michael in bed and strip the covers from him. He retreats to hide in the sauna as Ben finds solace in the spa.

Ben’s time in CQ must be somewhat refreshing for Stacey to spend some time with the other housemates, and over the dishes she and Zoe agree he does need to grow up a little. They often feel challenged by the need to lose challenges so Ben’s feelings aren’t hurt, a concept which they think is pretty silly.

Zoe and Estelle go into the bathroom for a face-off with Surly. Neither girl knows the other has a prior relationship with Surly. Estelle is shocked to learn Zoe was the first HM to meet Surly in week 2, and in true Estelle form I sense a little competition for another man in the house.

It’s Surly Bingo time, and during the game Surly puffs up in the tank. The girls are so excited, as is Surly, “He just loves bingo!”
Surly finds out Estelle has been cuddling up to Michael and totes shuts her down, turning his shared love for both girls towards Zoe, the declared winner of bingo and a luxurious goosedown pillow.

Sam goes into the diary room with Delilah, and tells BB that he thinks the HMs are getting closer and more honest with each other. Lovely Sam who has a shirt on, wants to continue his friendships with fellow HMs and doesn’t want to muddy the water.

In CQ, Ben and Michael are strategizing and Michael thinks that by talking about Layla too much they are turning her into the sympathy vote. Michael doesn’t want to see that happen like it did repeatedly with Estelle, and feels that Layla is almost running “out of wind” and he does not want to see conflict in the house “puff up her sails.”

The honeymoon is over, according to Michael and his theory is that if ‘they’ continue to bitch about Layla, it will give her the votes. Now it’s down to who is the most interesting.

Outside, there is similar talk and Zoe poses a theory of her own to Sam and Layla: that Sam strategically hooked up with Oatsy. Ouch.
While Layla freaks out, Sam and Michael use the ticket for the Temple room. Michael is excited because it is Zen, and he’s “all about Zen.”

Sorry. I just fell off my chair.

Sam and Michael open up to each other, giving Sam the opportunity to talk up Layla about her carefree, relaxed attitude.
Michael agrees that she is so pure, honest and loving (is this the same person who was talking to Ben in CQ? The Zen room really works, donnit?), before admitting that despite all his “iss-yuse” with Estelle, he now sees her as a beautiful, kind, intelligent girl. She is odd, but he “can forgive” because it’s an odd environment. She is a “pure, beautiful spirit and she’s okay to look at.”

Sorry I fell off my chair again.