My Kitchen Rules
I’ve loved you, My Kitchen Rules. Loved you hard. Recapped episodes, furiously previewed and enjoyed every bit of cooking drama and relationship conflict you’ve proffered up. And I just can’t swallow it any more.

The straw that broke this camel’s back was the hand-wringingly overblown drama over Kerrie & Craig’s purchased curry paste in the $10 meal drama. Sure, it’s a cooking competition and the contestants should be cooking food (based on this, how the hell are Josh & Andi still there?) but the wailing promos over what turned out to be a nothing issue has taken it too far.

Ashlee and Sophia have moved beyond a parody of reality contestants to become spiteful, bile-spewing individuals who recite producer’s notes as if their own. They’ve also proven they can cook asian-inspired dishes and not much else. Their best-before date has passed as villains and they now simply need to go out with the rest of the trash. New rivalry? Don’t care.

The created drama of the show is what is really hurting. We enjoy the relationship stuff, and who doesn’t love a sausage moment, but it’s no longer about cooking. If you were held to account by ACMA in any way it’d either have to be renamed “My Tie-in Advertising Rules” or “My Bitchiest Contestant Rules”. It’s gotten so it’s just not any fun any more. Drama, drama, drama.

And don’t for a second think we can’t all see through the vanity that is this coming Sunday’s episode designed to try to challenge The Voice Australia season two premiere. Sure, be competitive, but a conveniently cobbled together “bringing back the previously eliminated contestants (but not all of them)” show where eliminated contestants are put to the test in a restaurant’s kitchen? For a show about home cooks?

I don’t want you to think it’s me in any way – I still love TV, and I’ll probably even still tune in to see MKR here and there. It’s just no longer the appointment television this season that it has been in seasons past. It’s definitely you. You’ve overdone it. Pete didn’t help with his activated almonds thing earlier this year. Not that we care about the guest judges but you never introduce them – AT ALL. That can’t be in their contract.

Actually, if I never see Guy Grossi pontificate over food again it’ll be too soon. So this break up isn’t all bad.

Of course I’ll watch the finale. Of course I’ll tune in next year when you relaunch. Just for now… we’re done.

Much love,

Molk.

P.S. If you do clean up your act this season, do let me know. Just don’t promote the hell out of it.