There was lots of great TV come to us new or in new seasons in 2010 – Modern Family, Glee, Rake, MasterChef (proper & Junior), The Block, Sherlock, Gruen Nation/Transfer, The Librarians to name just a few. But there was also some complete tragedies. Not the ‘fail away in a whimper after having been jogged around in the schedule’ misses – these are epic tragedies that represent blots on the resumes of all concerned. Stuff you know they should not have even let get past the original pitch, let alone film it and put it to air. For more than one episode (some were lucky to make that, and even one didn’t even get to air!).

For your consideration: the television that should never have made it to air in 2010…

Australia Versus  –  Ch7
What was Tim Ross thinking? I mean, I know that leaving radio he needed a gig (and his book is a great summer laugh of a read), but a clip show? Who did he think he was – Bert Newton?! Having 90’s throwbacks Hale & Pace wasn’t the smartest of decisions either… it wasn’t Rosso’s fault – he was handed a turkey – and it slipped away quietly after only 1 episode.

The Bounce  – Ch7
It was a valiant attempt. Peter Helliar is a sporting nut, and to get some of the talent he was able to assemble as a part of Channel 7’s attempt to prove they could match Ch9’s The Footy Show (AFL) always showed promise. They they opened the show with the same taxi gag that the Matty Johns Show was running with (just using Peter Rowsthorn instean of Anh Do), and it was all downhill from there. Melbourne is a tough crowd, I guess, and maybe they were all Strachnie’d out? It’s supposed to return… but don’t hold your breath.

The Matty Johns Show – Ch7
This show persists… despite it not really knowing what it wants to do. Comedy for Matty’s characters? Variety? A show talking NRL footy? When the MJS was talking NRL with Shane Webcke & the other commentators like Ray Hadley it was at it’s best. Then there was the “comedy”. Not. Funny. Even including Tony Bonner (well past his use by date) didn’t help. To make matters worse, half of the audience would have no context of who ‘Don Kirke’ was supposed to be lampooning. Please Matt – just talk footy.

Hey Hey it’s Saturday – Ch9
I’ve spoken at length about this previously. I loved Hey Hey, and the 2010 series did nothing to develop that. Everyone looked tired, except the comedy writers as they didn’t have to do a thing (lazy bastards). There’s still no news as to the return of Hey Hey for 2011, however considering it wasn’t listed in Ch9’s 2011 schedule at their launch for next year… you do the math…

The X Factor Australia –  Ch7
Despite it’s “ratings success” (1.8m for the finale, making it 29th overall for the year is not success), The X Factor Australia was far too much about the judges and far too little about the “talent” they’d assembled. This was possibly a good thing as that talent wasn’t great – Altiyan won, for crying out loud, when Sally was a much better singer (but nobody needed another Casey Donovan). $25 million down the drain, Channel 7 – you think about that.

Don’t Stop Believing  – Ch10
This is my favourite and my best simply because there was so much promise and then nothing. Vanished. Didn’t even get a pilot up. GORNE. I also love (Channel 10’s head of programming) David Mott in Mumbrella‘s video below talking it up – “wait until you see what we do with it!”. We’re still waiting, David.

Cops LAC  – Ch9
Kate, Kate, Kate. We all knew you needed something to shake off your role as Sally Fletcher from Home & Away, but was this it? A gritty cop drama that wasn’t gritty or dramatic? So much sizzle, so much glam, so much more money should have been spent on a script & a plot.

The White Room – Ch7
Ahem. Did. Not. Work. On so many levels. Not through lack of trying by the hosts and the contestants, either. Maybe a little too much trying. I pity all concerned – The White Room should not have even seen the light of day past a rehearsal.

Not everything can be great – you need a lot of average to ensure you appreciate the excellent (just ask any school teacher). I mean no disrespect to those involved with the above programs. Just next time – pause for reflection for a moment before someone shoves an idea in front of you and says “this is awesome, you *have* to be involved in this”. Please.