After a massive week that saw the network lurch from near receivership to sitting pretty, an e-mail, allegedly doing the rounds within the Channel 9 bunker, has been leaked containing some mischievous fun. A result of answered prayer from some nervous staff in the middle of negotiating their contract renewals? Divine inspiration? Someone wanting a better deal?

A PSALM. OF DAVID.

Gyngell is my shepherd; I shall not want.

He makes me to lie down in Oaktree-d pastures: he leads me beside Apollo-ed waters.

He restores my Block: he leads me in the paths of newsworthiness for his and his Dad’s name’s sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of debt, I will fear no evil: for he is with me; his Stefanovic and his Wilkins, they comfort me.

He prepares a table for me at Lee’s Fortuna Court in the presence of my enemies: he anoints my head with oil; my schedule runneth over.

Surely ratings and kind reviews shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Voice forever.