The Block Sky HighSun 6:30pm, Mon-Thu 7pm, Ch9
As if we’d not seen enough conflict this week, it’s time for The Final Showdown (Thanks Europe). Trixie v the Twiins and someone’s as mad as hell and not going to take it any more. There may even be tears.

Though it does start with a Harry Potter-esque motif. Which doesn’t make a lot of sense until the Block flashes red.

The Twiins have started early and don’t care who they wake up, even Posh who’s under orders to get more sleep. Twiin 1 dashed home for a visit so Twiin 2 is stuck at the Block trying to bring it all together. Wonder Twiins activate!

The creatures are stirring on Level 5 where Trixie reveals they’re going to put in the steam room they’ve purchased but not connect it up. The recap reveals just how childish it’s all become. There even seemed to be a moment of peace with a treaty signed between Levels 1 & 5 but seemingly it’s not worth the cardboard it has been written on.

Sun up. Cue tradies. And Keef’s understand of Newton’s third law of physics (which surprises everyone because we just thought we were looking at a leaky pipe problem).

Keef’s noticed that Jarrod’s plumber has pushed on and done a bunch of tiling BEFORE the waterproofing had been done. Oops. “Never easy on the Block, mate,” says Keef. So Jarrod goes off to explain to the tiler what’s gone on who feels he has to offer an explanation to camera while two green lumps grow out of his head.

On further inspection the tiler decides to take on Keef’s ruling. Because, yeah, that’ll work out well. The Blockinator takes no shit from no one. It’s almost like he was listening to the conversation on the audio devices next week.

Life certainly isn’t easy on the Block. If it’s not Keef telling your tiler what he will and will not do, then it’s someone getting upset over a long-haired roller. Which, remarkably, isn’t Keef (he is quite hirsute but he maintains a rigorous manscaping schedule).

Stuff in, out, up, down, turn it all around – The Block is one big game of hokey pokey. Becs’s still got her sizeable nose out of joint over having to paint the building, and Twiin 2 isn’t too happy either. She’s kissed and made up with Johnno & Trixie – or so we thought. All these flash forwards are harder to track than a Tobey Maguire film.

While Trixie’s out she offers to get a bunch of painting stuff for the Twiins – Twiin 2 has stopped painting to watch and “surprise” previous Blockheads Rod & Tania have arrived to measure up for stainless steel stools for the steam room. Stainless steel stools for the steam room. Stainless steel stools for the steam room. Beetlejuice.

Trixie pops in and drops off the painting gear. Nothing more to see here.

Keef is back on Level 4 to check on the waterproofing, and nothing’s happened. Jarrod & his tiler have brought in a building inspector who has approved a lesser solution to what Keef asked to be done. Heads are gonna roll and Jarrod’s caught right in the middle of it all. Just the way he likes it (apparently).

Everyone else is managing to push on with their bathrooms but now Madi & Jarrod are caught and it’s stop work until this waterproofing is sorted. Madi’s the only one that realises that keeping the Blockinator happy is the only way to go.

Twiin 2 has really pushed on with the painting and even Keef’s impressed. Becs kicking on too, as is Madi and Trixie and Johnno. “If there’s one thing we can do is paint,” saus Johnno. “You’ve got a better brush than me,” says Madi. “I can’t even get into my cracks.” Insert your own joke about paint in your crack and tradies here.

Johnno & Trixie are extra motivated to get their exterior painted because their kids are coming for a visit this weekend. Cue tears from someone.

Madi’s pleased she’s not stuck in traffic and is happy to be painting. Four hours after the waterproofing debacle popped up there’s resolution and Jarrod & his tiler have agreed with Keef at what needs to be done. At least someone’s happy.

Johnno & Trixie are nailing their exterior painting. But what’s gotten up Twiin 2’s schnozz is that she asked for a long haired roller and only got a normal one. This in itself could be resolved easily but nothing is easy for the Twiins. She convenes an emergency meeting of her pity party (Posh, Becs, Madi) and bleats to them how J&T are using a long haired roller and they gave her a short one.

I mean, it’s not like she could just pop down and get her own long haired roller, is it? So naturally she pops up to Level 5 to confront Trixie. When Trixie calls her out on it, Twiin 2 gets defensive. It’s all left on an awkward “just checking you weren’t stitching me up”. So Trixie decides to head out and get Twiin 2 a shaggy roller “and then she can fucking sit on it”.

It’s just not going to end well.

As Trixie passes by Level 2 she sees Twiin 2 having a beer who tells her she doesn’t have to go and get rollers for everyone. FLUFFY ROLLER GATE!!! You’d think it was all over except for the return of Twiin 1 and the inevitable “that lady on Level 5 has been so rude to us” which is like picking at the scab of a sore that’ll never heal BECAUSE ALL YOU DO IS PICK AT THE SCAB!

Two days left until room reveal and sleep is for the weak (and seemingly every contestant on the Block at the moment).

Walls are getting ripped out and noise everywhere. Becs has proven her rolling technique is crap but a fluffy roller covers a multitude of sins. Madi’s now borrowing J&T’s fluffy roller, and Becs doesn’t want to get involved and then proceeds to get involved.

Twiin 2 is at Mitre 10 and forming her own conclusions as to Trixie’s story and “she’s set me up and I’ve just caught her out.” It really sounds like she’s forgiven and forgotten. “I knew I’d get to the bottom of it,” she says. PUH-LEASE. Now she’s banging on about her “police instinct” for fuck’s sake like it’s something inherent to her being.

It’s full steam ahead (thank you!) for the installation of J&T’s steam room, but there’s a problem – the plumber’s put the pipes about 10mm out and it doesn’t line up with the holes in the pre-formed glass walls. In both ensuites. It means disturbing everything and reapplying the waterproofing which completely holds up their installs with Stegbar. If only Johnno & Trixie had a conflict with some other contestants to distract them in the meantime…

The Twiins return and are still fuming over the great wrong they’ve suffered over the fluffy roller.

Trixie’s offering moral support to Johnno over the bathroom debacle. “We’ll fix it with magic and pixie dust,” offers Johnno. The Blockinator pitches in and it looks like it’s solved the problem. PHEW! So now everything should be A-OK. Hang on, why has Twiin 2 come up to Level 5?…

It’s the showdown they’ve been sizzling all week. Twiin 2 reveals her investigation and starts at Trixie as to why she purchased the wrong thing yesterday. Johnno tries to settle things and Trixie blows up at the suggestion that she intentionally set the Twiins up. Circumstantial evidence isn’t big for the South Australian police and right now we all need to be thankful the girls don’t have handguns: “BANG! Stop or I’ll shoot!”.

It all falls apart as the girls refuse to listen and Trixie has a hysterical laughing fit over the constant accusations. There will be no middle ground. There will be no solution. There will now always be tension between Level 1 and Level 5. It’s worse than a high school bitch fight over a boy.

Trixie’s now decided they will deliver the steam room this week just because they have to. At least J&T get to sit down to some delicious Indian with Posh & Becs and Madi & Jarrod – it allows Johnno to claim the role of Pappa Dum. There’ll be little time to focus on it next time as they’ve got to finish the damn bathrooms then and NONE of them even look close to being half-finished.